Erica writes…

Imagine that you walk into the salon, all you want is a blowout and a trim, so that is what you think you’re getting. But, oh no the stylist has something totally different in mind. What she has in mind is to CUT your hair. She cuts a big chunk of your hair and it falls over your shoulders. WHAT IN THE WORLD! THIS CAN’T BE REAL! You jump up and ask her, “What are you doing?” She responds, “You wanted me to cut it right?” You try to stay calm. While feeling the little fuzz left on your head, you state, “ No, I just wanted a trim!” while tears run down your face. You have been growing your hair out for so long and now in seconds a big chunk of your hair is gone. The stylist proceeds to look in her book and says, “Oh I think I got you mixed up with the other girl in my book.”

Well, this is my reality. I ended up sitting in the chair fuming because it was a few hours before my Birthday dinner. She assured me that she could camouflage it. I left the salon and my hair was just bouncing and beautiful, but I could not stop touching the spot where I was pretty close to bald. I felt ugly and I tensed up every time someone came close to my hair. Ever since then I refuse to go to a stylist to get my hair straightened or trimmed. The only problem is that when I try to straighten my hair myself, it is a frizzy Fraggle Rock mess.

Sonia writes…

In sixth grade, the time when we start to notice boys and they start to notice us, I go to the hairdresser one school night. It was actually a cosmetology school. Well, I went in with a head full of hair and returned to school the following day with a teensy weensy fro’ that had no shape, no style, no moisture. It was just sitting atop my head. Apparently, the student beautician left the relaxer in my hair too long. When she was rinsing, she had this look of pure horror on her face, called my mother over to the bowl where most of my hair was lying. I can’t remember the conversation, just the look on the ‘want to be’ hairstylist’s face and my Mother’s. I knew it was bad!

Dominique writes…

My mom and I had been going to this stylist for several years. All of a sudden the stylist began to change my appointments to accommodate her schedule. It got to the point where she would just wrap my hair and put me under the dryer. She didn’t comb it down, curl it or anything.

One day while getting a relaxer, I told her I wanted a straw set and she told me, “it would take to long’. I was upset, but I just said okay. I sat there obviously upset. While she stops doing my relaxer and tells me that I need to stop being mad. I bit my tongue and didn’t say anything because we had been going to her for so long and she was a friend of my Mom. She finished applying the relaxer and we were at the shampoo bowl. I didn’t feel like she rinsed the relaxer out well enough. Keep in mind she is still going on about how she always accommodates my mom and me all the time (LIES). I let it go in one ear and out the other.

I wait for her to put me under the dryer with my deep conditioner and I call my mom and tell her what just happened. Out of the corner of my eye, I see she is doing another lady’s hair and I can just tell by the way they are looking at me that they are talking about me. At this point I am pissed, I couldn’t take being there a second longer. I let her rinse my conditioner out and when she tells me to go to her chair, I walked out the door and waited for my mom to pick me up. I never went back and neither did my mom. I decided to cut my hair and go natural, haven’t had a stylist in almost 3 years.

How many of us have been in this scenario before? A stylist that changes your appointments and tells you what kind of styles you can and cannot get? Share your stories at info@maneandchic.com and leave your thoughts about Dominique’s situation in the comments.

Giavana writes…

Stylists have always complimented me on my hair because it was full of body, thick and healthy. So much so, that this trainee in her last semester of beauty school asked me to model my hair in a show that she was participating in sponsored by Dudley’s. I was elated because the idea of modeling was just so fascinating.

Well, although my hair is gorgeous, my scalp sucks. My scalp hates chemicals and would burn in anticipation of relaxer. Thus, I never (or very rarely) had the bone straight look. I had a relaxer about 3 weeks before she styled me for the show, but when I went to meet her the day of the show, she informed me that she would need to give me a relaxer because my hair wasn’t “straight enough” and because it was one of the requirements of the contest. I agreed, but gave her a disclaimer about my scalp being sensitive and the areas that were likely to burn the fastest. I also told her that I wasn’t expecting a relaxer and was scratching a lot.

I would find out that she disregarded everything I said. She left the relaxer on for about an hour. After the relaxer, she tried to style my hair, which meant raking a fine tooth comb through my already sensitive head, using heat to straighten the areas that didn’t take and spraying my tresses with extraordinary amounts of spritz. I had a head full of scabs and eyes full of tears. Ironically enough, my hair survived and was absolutely gorgeous (so I was told), but as I sashayed down the runway, I was fighting the grimace of my head being on fire. I really don’t know who won the contest that night and I honestly didn’t care. I just knew I never wanted to see that stylist ever again.

Most of us have been in this scenario at least once in our lives. If you care about your hair, don’t get any chemicals done by a student or by someone whose work you aren’t familiar with. Next, don’t just sit idly by and let someone do whatever to your hair. If it hurts, it’s uncomfortable or something just doesn’t seem right — you need to speak up. I guess most women don’t say anything because they don’t want to come off as difficult. Well, you don’t have to be a bitch or anything, but you also don’t want to go home bald headed. Lesson of the day: speak up for your hair!

What would you have done in this situation? Leave your feedback in the comments.

Do you have any hair horror stories or any stories on how you averted this kind of situation because you spoke up? Send them to info@maneandchic.com.

Trinity writes…

I have always been very proud of my naturally long thick hair. While other women wore weaves and braids, I had no need for fake hair because I had enough hair to experiment with all sorts of cute styles. At 20, my oldest sister asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. The day before the wedding my mother was in a rush, so I allowed her to use an old perm that had been in the refrigerator for a few months. I warned my mother that the perm may not take well, but the clock was ticking and we still had to help set up the wedding decorations.

I threw the cold perm on my head and loved the fact that it did not burn my scalp at all. To my surprise, it was one of the best perms I ever had. The perm had my hair looking brand new! I was proud of how my hair flowed like a European goddess (how stupid). The wedding was a hit and I received many compliments and nasty looks from women who thought I had on some good weave, but I was proud to announce that it was all my glory attached to my scalp.

Three weeks after the wedding my hair began to shed more than usual while just combing through it. The oddest thing about my hair loss was that the hair did not break off, the roots and the hair came completely off my head. Within a month, I was shedding like a dog. My hair came off like fur balls in the shower, all over the carpet in my room, and the scariest part was the fact that my bed was covered with hair. I would have to pick hair out of my mouth, food and clothing. My scalp was so sensitive that I refused to wash my hair because the pain was unbearable. Every time the water hit my scalp I could feel each thump of the droplets hitting my scalp with great force. It felt like something was burning a hole in my head. Within two months, I had no hairline and bald spots around my head.

Eventually, my mother took me to her dermatologist. She was a short white woman who hated perms with a passion. “Just flat iron your hair if you want it straight”, she kindly advised me. She explained that relaxed hair has a greater amount of protein loss — relaxers cause the hair to lose its natural strength. The doctor then proceeded to examine my scalp and told me that the hair loss would continue until I shaved off all my hair and started all over from scratch. The roots of my hair had been damaged by the perm, so they were no longer able to stay attached to my scalp. I nearly fainted when she told me I had to walk around looking like a space alien for the next few months. My father shaved my head that same day and that’s when I decided that I would never perm my hair again. Today I am 6 years natural and growing strong.

Share your hair stories, send them to info@maneandchic.com.